Trump attacked Iran to safeguard Iran's right to ballistic missiles. Got it.
In a key concession, the Iranians agreed to give Trump his wedgie without TV or media present.
The flag of the Democratic Republic of Congo is not just a flag. It's also an anti-flag. 🇹🇿
Hoover isn't Trump's favourite president? Well, Trump is Hoover's favourite president. He's making Herbert look pretty good.
"Whoa, whoa--we don't want somebody being the next Luke Skywalker here..."
Before Trump attacked Iran, Iranian protesters begged the US for help toppling the regime. A man asked me: "Can Trump help us?" I answered: "Trump only helps Trump."
Now Trump says: "I never cared about regime change."
Depending on Trump is like jumping off a cliff and asking Jesus to catch you.
That UFC douchebag moment, celebrated by Donald Trump, reminds me of this Aliens exchange. Starring Bill Paxton as Trump: www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oXL...