My dad was SUCH a scatterbrain.
(He was a hitman, it was kind of his signature)
It annoys me that Scottish people use Americanisms like "what's not to like?" but Americans won't use Scottishisms like
"smell yer maw"
TARTAN ARMY DO YOUR THING
The judge said 'pyromaniac'. I prefer 'event organiser'
I have a sideline in making brick houses for pigs. It’s not a huge earner but it helps to keep the wolf from the door
My cousin is a tireless worker. Which is unfortunate as he works in the Detroit branch of Kwik Fit
My favourite restaurant. You don’t have to order anything. Food just comes to you. Food you DESERVE
Happy birthday to Paul McCartney who is 84 today, but thinks he is 73 because he ACTUALLY believes there are eight days a week
By the time the Tartan Army leave the States I want the word “jobby” to have entered the American vernacular
Great news, religions! Christianity is finally allowing access to and use of John the Baptist under a new prophet-sharing scheme.
Item 5434/2029 in the latest Argos catalogue IS the latest Argos catalogue. It's a philosophical conundrum