I like love corned beef hash
⬇️If you wanna⬇️
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lalalyds
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That was way funnier in my head
Funny thing happened on the way to armageddon
Feel the blood rushing back to your heart? Yes that’s Spring
We set up a sliver of camp for the moon but the light came full with craters and a bright circle pick up lines for telescopes texts on standby. "Anyone got dimes for the payphone" that was its big joke
Wars are very embarrassing. Violence is incredibly weak. I don’t even have to raise my voice. I just shoot a look.
Everything is horrible, but we are giving everyone the chance to join our kickball team.
Wake up and smell the stupid
Still have a movie from blockbuster. Sarah Michelle Gellar’s restaurant is failing when a mystical crab at the market scuttles into her bag & hides in her kitchen. When it pinches its claws, she cooks her feelings into her food & it gets bewitching. Some crimes are well worth it.
Hey. Pizza for breakfast and a Perfect Strangers marathon. You in?
When a simple question just stares at you asking for something more, switch its shit around, it's answer blowing. "How do you winter for preparedness." And watch as it invents staying indoors being paranoid
