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Intensive Careless. theonion.com/schtick-star... @theonion.com
America is “Getting Rolled”* *Latest Fad Slang @theonion.com
Our once-great country has gone from D-Day to Zzzzzzzz-Day. @theonion.com
Some SICKO got arrested protesting our patriotic Data Centers … and look what he was wearing: www.instagram.com/reel/DZEijHN...
A “Stranger” will unite us! @theonion.com
More and more, these radical thoughts are being eSPOUSEd … @theonion.com
I’ve lost my appetite. @theonion.com
A heaping helping of Kelly Kudos to this pillar of journalism for such refined and sophisticated use of BOTH Lady Liberty and Uncle Sam:
Get excited, ladies - your new physical appearance guide is on the stands now! @theonion.com
Zzzzzzzzzz
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