"The Americans can't get the slime out of their capital's monument pool and will arrest you for touching it," sounds like the sort of lie they'd tell us in the Soviet Union so we'd stop bitching about bread lines.
if anyone tries to pass a "no sexuality for kids" policy you bet i will point out every single fairy tale that ends with a marriage to a handsome prince and flag it for breaching the rule. These fuckers always forget that heterosexuality is sexuality