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Fugitive warlord. Indicted crypto kingpin. Disgraced former intern. Dry clean only. He/him/his Fitzy’s Funtastic Feed: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:eeuovmdmopwss5bsf7el3ra7/feed/aaabi4hywtg5g
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having cereal for dinner doesn’t make me pathetic, it makes me relatable. right?
Dashboard warning lights are the hieroglyphs of doomed civilization.
Congratulations your skeet made me throw my phone
They should make a self cleaning oven that cleans the whole house
1h
20m
i am done having a body, i say into your ring camera as i dump a corpse on your front porch
2h
are finger guns technically nail guns?
is it a midlife crisis or a crisis of a life that is mid?