its been a while since ive been like this and riding it out is really wffing hard when you have a job that requires you to deal with the public.
i just want a woman who can look at me and think, "i can wreck him" and then make me financially stable. menally and emotionally just aimt gonna happen. i need my Ms Clause, the wlf in charge of the other elves, the one who actually runs the show, propping me up like a puppet king.
maybe my lack of sleep is catching up to me
Zeus came home today. got his cremains from the vet. im a mess. i miss my boy
i think ive lost the magic. i havent been able to pull myself out of this depression ive been in since Zeus died. meds arent really helping right now. my spark is dimmed. it barely flickers most days. ive tried everything i can do on my own or with others.
random thoughts. is it a generational thing where insults and even racial slurs were used as terms of endearment, or is my family really that messed up?
thinking about buying some land and building a couple vardos to live in instead of a house. id prefer a hole in the ground. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat.
