Team meeting this morning: Anyone have any fun weekend plans?
Me: Well I'm trying to get my ass eaten at the Pride afters.
Stop asking your gay coworkers what we do on the weekends.
Yes I'm aware this is a MySpace era selfie leave me alone I'm a thirty-fucking-seven year old millennial.
Taking a xanax and playing League of Legends. You are legally required to report me if I show up in your game.
Between all my Instagram, Reddit, and Tik Tok scrolling I'm pretty sure I've given myself Carpal Tunnel in my left hand.
Sorry dude, you don't have the body or dick to get away with not sending face pics.
Pride makes me smile.
My HOA is using an Ellen DeGeneres quote to celebrate Pride for the June newsletter and this is why straight people shouldn't be allowed at Pride.
Just had a man with a painfully thick dick leave his babies inside me. Happy Pride everyone!
I am once again begging for attention online with the only pose I know.
I despise the smug "um akshually corpos don't care about gay people!" thing people do every year. No shit. Literally no one actually thought that. We want their rainbow icons because it's a signal to us that it's ok to be out of the closet. You aren't smart.
