Life is weird - letβs laugh at it before it eats us. Not waving but drowning.
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I'd rather mate outside my species than screw a Republican.
MAGA buying a knockoff phone is the most on-brand thing since buying a Bible from a guy who bankrupted casinos.
Trumpβs Birthday Bash - Less UFC, More DMV Waiting Room
Letβs hope these medical specialists are as qualified and effective as the people Trump has in his cabinet.
Across America, strangers will high-five each other, group chats will erupt, dogs will wag at nothing. In DC, bartenders will ring bells. In Paris, a cigarette is lit. In Canada, someone will apologize for cheering. Democracy will exhale, kick off its shoes, and sit down.
βResidual algaeβ sounds like whatβs left after a Trump Cabinet meeting.
Trumpβs staff meeting in the Situation Room about the Epstein cover-up is like a fire drill where everyone brought gasoline just to be safe.
βNipplegate in the Situation Roomβ is the kind of phrase that makes the republic ask for a blanket and a ginger ale.
I bought a new sailboat and now have to decide on a name but the problem with naming a new sailboat is that βWhy Did I Do This?β is already taken.