Good to see this website is still the spiritual home of lads who’ll make a compound word with wank at the start and think they’re Armando Iannucci.
A few days later, and still on meds, I heard a thundering noise (on the opposite side of the flat to the fire). I shuffled to the window just in time to see a helicopter make off with a perfectly healthy tree. I never got to the bottom of it.
If I hadn't taken photos I'd assumed I imagined it.